That look of resignation

When I was single I used to watch young married couples with a an uneasy concern. At church, many of the young fathers were my age, but the difference between us (at least in my mind) couldn't have been more stark. There they sat, shoulders slumped, gazing off into space with a zombie-like look of resignation. They looked dead inside, totally void of vitality, just going through the motions. It was both depressing and—for one looking to get married and have children someday—disconcerting.
I knew some of these guys! Before they became MWC (married with children) we'd gone snowboarding, rock climbing or mountain biking together. They'd been full of life and energy back then! We'd toss around plans for the next big adventure and crack jokes.
Then they got married and the next time I saw them, two years later, they were sitting in sacrament meeting staring lifelessly into space while their kid did a header off the pew. They'd involuntarily reach down with one hand and plop the wailing tike back up on the bench, all without so much as a blink to break their trance. To my eye, they appeared profoundly depressed, awaiting the sweet release of a still-distant death.
Such scenes made me think seriously about the whole marriage thing. Was this what I could expect? In the end, their looks of resignation didn't discourage me, just scared the @#$! out of me. I promised myself this this would never happen to me.
Now that I'm a dad, I've formed some new opinions on this topic. First, I realize that many of these young fathers I observed hadn't slept more than 15 minutes in the last month. They were sleep deprived and exhausted. Despite the fact that they were sitting in church with a tie around their neck, they probably didn't know what day of the week it was much less why they were trying to burp the set of scriptures their wife just handed them.
Second, if they were at all resigned to their fate, it was in large part due to the fact that they'd driven to church in a mini-van whose name (something like "Town & Country") sounded like the retirement center they'd end up in someday. Either that or the thought that the next vacation that didn't involve Grandma's house or the word "Disney" was some three to four decades off.
And finally . . . well, I can't remember my last point. I'm a bit tired myself. But I will say this: I make an extra effort to look lively in sacrament meeting these days. Despite any perceived losses, I've gained so much more and, sleep deprived haze aside, I'm very happy. And I'm going to climb Mt. Rainier.